There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize