You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
