how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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