dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
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