ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I think I am morally bankrupt
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
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