I haven't been this sober since birth.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Randomize
