wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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