The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
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