dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Nobody cheats on THIS.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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