Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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