My room smells like vodka and shame
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Randomize