we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Did I show you my penis last night?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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