my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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