this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
this hospital has no fireball
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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