I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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