Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
