so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
My vagina is officially offended.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
