I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
