the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
