Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
