Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
