Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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