I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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