party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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