I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
