Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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