So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize