My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
