whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Redeem this text for a blowjob
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Randomize
