thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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