how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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