She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
We need to get me chipped asap
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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