But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
mondays should just be called national damage control day
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
