Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
