What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize