You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
