That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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