I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize