best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
