i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
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