I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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