your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
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