she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
