I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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