This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
