so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
