my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
