I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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