Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
