people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
