What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
We had to coat check the pizza.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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