so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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