Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(540): View more from Virginia

we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated

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(732): View more from New Jersey

just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..

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(438): View more from Quebec

that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage

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(252): View more from North Carolina

He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.

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(714): View more from California

I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay

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(860): View more from Connecticut

oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms

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(229): View more from Georgia

I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.

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(251): View more from Alabama

He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.

(1-251): View more from Alabama

you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?

(251): View more from Alabama

Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.

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