i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Randomize